A bunch of grapes

Flint watching Sally

Loving the grapes!

Two-legs called to see me today.

Can you guess what she gave me?

No Rug to Hide Under

What way is this to leave me at this time of year? It’s not Green Grass yet you know! She’s taken my rug off and I’m left bracing myself against the Scottish breeze and the hail, that is surely to come now that I am left in the nude. I suppose I am hardy enough for it… all the same, everyone else has their rug on. Rugs hide a mulitude of sins, namely my extra winter "plumage".

Not my "Good" side!

Captain America loves the chat (and the ladies). Bless him; he’s on the wrong side of the gate to do any mischief, but the chat is there all the same. He’s turned Audrey’s head, and Molly’s, a few times and we all know the happy state Fancy’s in! …beautiful ears…anyway, the bol’ Captain and the Major were full of chat this morning.  The Major is passed himself with excitement (Like a dog with two tails).  The Thug down the road has moved away, and with him the chance of some of us getting bitten while passing the gates.  Happy and relaxed days!

A grape, a grape. My kingdom for a grape!

I fear that I have been sold! And no one has had the decency to tell me… Ali G G has disappeared and my Two-legs seems too have left the planet also. I’ve not seen her for days and days! It really is no way to leave a loyal soul like me, standing here wondering if the taste of a grape will pass my lips again….she better show her face soon, or I’ll show her the wrong side of my hoof ...if she does show up again… Audrey says I’m mad for thinking I’m sold. She says if I was I wouldn’t be standing here complaining. I’d be somewhere else entirely and she wouldn’t have to stand here listening to me. I’m not sure if she is offering comfort or telling me to “shh!” Never-the-less, I am unimpressed with the neglect.

That marvellous Two-legs, on the Quad thing, still brings the haylage and I did see Sally with Auntie Jill down by the river yesterday. (Two-legs wouldn’t sell Sally.) Perhaps there’s a world shortage of grapes and she’s away to find a new supply.  

A Cob's Job

Two-legs stopped off on her way from leaving her Whaa to school and asked me if I fancied going out for a wee hack. I told her that I had a field of grass to clear, but that I would go for a while to keep her company.



Stinky Ben



She came back an hour later and led me to my stable and my bucket of eatables. Once my bucket was empty I realised that Two-legs had left me to my own devices.  She was no-where to be seen. I did see that my door is still not back on its hinges! I asked Two-legs about this when she reappeared (with hard hat and gloves).  She says it’s a job for Grumpy Drawers and she draws the line at DIY.  Joinery is his job.  I suspect that'll mean I will never have a door again.

My job it seems is to go where I am told and not stop to eat the scenery and try not to step on Stinky Ben, who insists on running in between my legs.  He's not half wise that dog! He is like a moving target and his target seems to be my hooves. I blame that Farrier, tempting Benny with my old hoof clippings. Sally's a much better hacking companion. She keeps the dreaded black sheep from spooking me senseless and gives me a reason to stop and rest while she "catches up".  Any excuse will do! 

Flint's joke

One day while he was at the track betting on the ponies and nearly losing his shirt, Mitch noticed a priest who stepped out onto the track and blessed the forehead of one of the horses lining up for the 4th race.
Lo and behold, that horse -- a very long shot -- won the race.
Before the following race, the Priest blessed yet another horse. Mitch made a beeline for the window, and placed a small bet on the horse. Again, even though it was another long shot, the horse the priest had blessed won the race.
Mitch collected his winnings, and anxiously waited to see which horse the priest would bless for the 6th race. The priest showed, blessed a horse, Mitch bet a large amount of money on it, and it won!
True to his pattern, the priest stepped out onto the track before the last race and blessed the forehead, eyes, ears, and hooves of one of the horses.
Mitch bet every cent he had, including his life savings and the deed to his house. Mitch then watched the horse come in dead last. He was dumbfounded.
He made his way to the track, and when he found the priest, he demanded, "What happened, Father? All day long you blessed horses and they won. The last race, you blessed a horse and he lost. Now, thanks to you, I've lost all my savings!"
The priest nodded wisely and said, "That's the problem with Protestants -- you can't tell the difference between a simple blessing and the Last Rites!

Not an Amused Muse!

She’s brought me into sketch she says, but I’ve explained that this is not possible, as I can’t use a pencil, on account of not possessing any hands. My mouth is pretty useful for picking the bolt and lifting the barrow, but I would run the risk of accidently eating a pencil if it found its way in to my mouth.  Apparently I’ve got the wrong end of the stick. It’s herself that’s to make a sketch of me. Fair enough! Provide me with a hay-net and I shall pose away!

The finished work is not much to look at, for I don’t know who this is she thinks she’s drawing, but it doesn’t resemble me in any way.  I am not that round! I may not be 17 2, or a TB, but I am still a fine example of physical perfection in equine form. Sure don't all my four legs reach the ground?!  My blessed mother has told me from the day I was born  that I am a fine example of physical perfection, and everyone knows that mother knows best!

I have a good mind to make short work of that picture. I don't suppose it will upset my tummy too much.

Stormy Night

A few long faces greeted me when I returned to my field this morning. Two-legs had brought me in for the night because of the storm.

Both Fawlty and Audrey were the first to greet me. Audrey wanted to know where I’d been. She’d worried that I had been blown away during the night. She hadn’t noticed me leaving with Ali G G and Crabby, so she had spent quite a bit of the night calling for me. It was nice of her to show some concern, and to get such a warm welcome from her on my return, but it would take some wind to lift old sturdy boots here off the ground!

Fawlty was keener to tell me about the drama they all had. During the wee small hours an errant plastic bag had entered the field and chased a few of the mares around for a while.  Fawlty said that he’d done his best to calm everyone, but that he had wished I’d been there. “I’m only two you know Flint! And Zabi was neither use nor ornament when I was trying to settle this lot down. It was a bad show. I wish you had been here!”

I was very glad not to have been out last night. I practically dragged Two-legs off her feet to get inside. I didn’t escape the drama completely tho’. I and Two-legs had our own fright last night. I was tucked up with my hay net for comfort listening to the howls of the wind when two legs opened the door and disappeared with it…completely. She made a few howls of her own and I did call after her to question what she was doing.  She appeared a few seconds later apologising and clutching her right arm. The door didn’t make a return. Apparently it had taken itself off with the wind.  It was a quieter night after that. Well, as quiet as it could be. Ponies don’t have much call for a door so I was quite content with it not being there.  

Everyone's delighted

There’s me, outside again last night, with the wind and the rain blattering down upon my poor naked head AND here’s Two-legs wrapped up like an onion complaining about the cold. Humph! At least she didn’t arrive with the two arms the one length. (I do like apples.) Audrey had wanted to come too, but Two-legs told her it was best to stay the on the right side of the gate and not to be so pushy.

The Farrier had come to trim my hooves.  I was delighted to see him.  I get lots of treats when the Farrier comes to sort out my hooves. Grapes aplenty and sometimes a Lick to keep me amused.  The dogs were delighted to see him/me too.  That’s still as disconcerting as ever!  I wish they’d hold their salivating back until after the trimmings were actually trimmings and not still part of my hoof.  I fear some day soon I’m going to wake up with a dog nibbling on the end of my leg! That Benny Dog is a looper...you never know what he might do!

Audrey was most impressed by my hooves when I returned.  She spent a long time inspecting me for anymore changes to my appearance. She mothers me a bit. I wish she wouldn’t. I have a strong image to project, and protect.